3 Rants

Since I've been in Boston, I've noticed few things that would evoke a rant from me.  However, I feel the need to take this time to address three things that to a Californian are, well, quite frankly absurd.

First, no towns around here are phonetically spelled. Haverhill is pronounced "Haverull." Reading is pronounced "Redding." I can deal with those- they aren't too farfetched. However, when you start getting to the "-cesters," I lose it. Gloucester= GLAHSTAH, Worcester= WOOSTAH. Excuse me? Is this like a Castile, Spain type of deal where someone in high power had a speech impediment so all the words became adapted to that? These towns don't even follow the rules of vowels+syllables! Drives me nuts.

Secondly, it's freakin' WINDY here. Forget Chicago, this place should be called the Windy City. Beantown, my ass. More like Wind Town. I've always loathed the wind... ever since long soccer tournament days out in Lancaster aka the Windy Buttcrack of America. But for some reason I don't hate it as much here. It's frigid and cold, don't get me wrong... but not as annoying as the winds I'm used to. Weird.

Last but not least, THERE ARE NO TOILET SEAT COVERS IN THE STATE OF MASSACHUSETTS! Do they not believe in them? Are they trying to be eco-friendly? It's unbelievable. Not that I would ever touch my cheeks to a toilet seat anyway (squatting is the way to go), but come on people. What if I had to blast an emergency dookie? Can't do that squatting. Maybe I should start carrying around hand sanitizer just in case I need an impromptu post-public bathroom butt wash.

Just 3 little ol' things that I find irksome about Boston... trust me, the pros far outweigh the cons!

Have the happiest of Thanksgivings and enjoy being with family (for those of us who can't).

Over n' out.